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Part Two of the book

The nine sessions

Between August 1959 and October 22, 1960, Seaich recorded nine sessions, two with mescaline and seven with LSD. Each journal is timed to the minute. This page gives the date, theme and a line from each; the full entries are in the book.

Updated

These records belong to the legal and scientific context of 1959–1960. They are history, not guidance: nothing in them is medical advice, and the substances are controlled today in most jurisdictions.

Session I · August 1959

The first session

Mescaline

The opening entry runs from mid-morning into the night. Nausea gives way to color, then to music: he notes a long stretch of “sheer bliss with music (Wagner)” before visitors break the spell.

Journal · August 1959
8:00City lights (in darkness) look like jewels. Very intense and colorful.

Session II · November 8, 1959

The threshold

LSD

A deliberately small first trial of LSD. At first he believes the drug is not working; by mid-afternoon he records music playing in his mind “much more palpable than usual daydreaming.”

Journal · November 8, 1959
4:30Poetry (T. S. Eliot, Four Quartets) seems to have much more intense meaning.

Session III · November 21, 1959

Testing an antidote

LSD

Seaich tests whether a vitamin, nicotinamide, can blunt the effects. It barely does. A walk at dusk ties the experience to childhood memory, the book’s central theme.

Journal · November 21, 1959
5:30Went for a walk in the dusk. The winter scene had a novel freshness about it. Seemed to be pervaded by a long-forgotten childhood sensation.

Session IV · December 17, 1959

The first full mystical experience

LSD

The longest and most intense of the early sessions: kaleidoscopic visions, Mahler’s Third Symphony, and an evening by the Christmas-tree lights in which he recreated “the sensation of Christmas as I knew it in childhood.”

Journal · December 17, 1959
3:45Can hear crickets chirping — am back in a childhood scene — a summer evening — this most unusual!

Session V · January 3, 1960

A challenging experience, and recovery

LSD

Bliss with Mozart turns into emptiness and “utter zero-ness.” Then the mood lifts again. Seaich records the difficult hours as plainly as the good ones.

Journal · January 3, 1960
2:40World seems cold, strange, empty. Can’t make my inner self work this time.

Session VI · January 23, 1960

The great childhood-memory session

Mescaline

After an hour of regret and nausea come color, flame-like visions and a sense of “creative energy, revitalization.” He ends the day in “a harmonious emotion of outpouring goodwill and happiness.”

Journal · January 23, 1960
1:30All splendid fire and heat; a divine force pulsating in vision beyond all description.

Session VII · February 28, 1960

A threshold-state experiment

LSD

A small-dose experiment in mood. Listening to Tristan, he finds childhood recollections “trying to draw me back against my will into their sinister magic.”

Journal · February 28, 1960
5:00A strange world of otherness, neither euphoric nor dysphoric, ensued.

Session VIII · March 5, 1960

A lesson in set and setting

LSD

Telephone calls and interruptions cut across the peak of the session, and he records what was lost. The entry reads today as an early account of why setting matters.

Journal · March 5, 1960
4:00Light! Pure light! Just to sit and stare into translucent Being!

Session IX · October 22, 1960

The closing entry

LSD

The last journal, written after a seven-month pause. It closes the record of the experiments.

Journal · October 22, 1960
3:05Suddenly noticed a beauty in the sky which I had long forgotten. A cloud formation recalled some distant notion of adventure.

The full journals

Every entry, as he typed it

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